My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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