i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
