reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
