Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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