made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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