I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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