If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
