weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
