What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
