we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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