i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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