we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
