dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Randomize