y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize
