I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize