It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
It's just like the Real World with babies
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
