btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
