they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
