They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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