We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
