Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
