i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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