he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
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