She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
