i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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