In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
