Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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