in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I had to cum in my sink.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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