can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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