at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
