Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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