Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
