Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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