I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
