is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
