i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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