the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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