I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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