All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
We need a shit load of segways right now
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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