If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Randomize