Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
