That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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