things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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