i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Blood and glitter go together right?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
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