who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
