I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
