very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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