i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
why does every cop we meet know your name?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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