try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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