i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
